Daily Headlines

 Daily Headlines

The Dawn of an Empire

2021. augusztus 21. – 14:49

Followed by an emergency council meeting of the Hungarian government on August 20th, The State Foundation Day of the Hungarian Nation, prime minister Viktor Orban emerged from the Parliament building to deliver a historic statement to the press and the Hungarian people. With a cerebral, determined expression on his face, the prime minister announced the immediate launch of Operation Benyovszky, or the first stage of the Hungarian Imperial Project, which will see the occupation and colonisation of the island of Madagascar or ‘Magyagaszkar’. The Hungarian army, airforce and fleet will embark on their imperial quest through land, river, air and sea towards the lands which were once ours, ruled over by their just Hungarian Governor, Count Moricz Benyovszky in the 18th century, from whom it was taken by cruel force, and which shall be ours once more. 

“Too long has our esteemed nation suffered under the ruthless, liberal whip and bullying of Brussels and the European Union - too long have we grieved the loss of Great Hungary and shed tears over the memory of Trianon. Too long have we watched the bourgeoisie and Gyorgy Soros corrupt our country with foreign, anti-Christian values. It’s time Hungary has reclaimed its rightful place in the world and exported its noble culture and economy into a new, virgin territory, where we can rebuild our ancestral home and start anew under the fearless, watchful eyes of the Mighty Turul”, were the words of PM Orban.  

Operation Benyovszky and the settlement of Magyagaszkar will include a pervasive economic, social and cultural integration and assimilation strategy. Viktor Orban, prime minister of Hungary and King of Magyagaszkar, plans among others to build the first (real) Hungarian Beach and luxurious holiday destination around the island coastline with New Siofok, New Zamardi and the capital, Port Orban. Hungarian folk traditions and rural culture shall prevail in this new land - where once was uncivilized jungle, there will follow a flourishing agrarian society with the naturalization of Hungarian Grey Cattle, wine industry and the Shadoof in the New Alfold. The Hungarian Sports&Tourism Agency has already proposed countless innovative opportunities for an entirely uncharted enterprise in hospitality and entertainment, focusing on a fusion of Hungarian and indigenous cuisine (which was the only mention of any plans regarding the current inhabitants of Madagascar) as well as annual sport and music spectacles like ‘jungle horse gallop’ and the Hungarian Imperial Eurovision (that's not "too gay"). We will also be bringing Magyagaszkar penguins to Hungary because they are, as the Prime Minister accurately stated, “Very cute”. 

Prime Minister King Orban called upon the brave citizens of Hungary, who feel themselves and their families to be ready to represent their nation’s true Christian values to volunteer as the first Magyagaszkari settlers in the first wave colonisation this coming winter. They will be provided with a plot of land, one gun per man, 10.000 HUF in cash, a Bible and 100 jars of Paprika.  

The Prime Minister closed his speech with words of aspiration that are certain to ripple through the pages of history: “This is a new era for the Magyar people and the Magyar Empire - this is our destiny, this is Magyagaszkar!”